Fathers

Kids Can Be Foodies Too! Check Out Netflix’s Family-Friendly Show “Somebody Feed Phil”

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It can be difficult to find a family-friendly show that’s a good fit for both younger and older kids. We love the new Netflix series Somebody Feed Phil, which follows the travel and food adventures of Phil Rosenthal, a television writer who brings enthusiasm and wonder with him whoever he goes. He was recently interviewed by 7-year-old fan Evan Wittenberg, who asks the hard-hitting questions we want answers to, such as “What’s the grossest food you ate this season?”:

https://www.tastecooking.com/phil-rosenthal-vs-a-7-year-old/

We hope you enjoy the show too!

How Much Choice Do Kids Need?

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UnknownDr. Corinne Masur

Once upon a time (when I was growing up) children were told, “Tonight we are having chicken a la king for dinner.”  Now, you might have hated chicken a la king, or perhaps you had the same thing for lunch at school…but that was STILL what was for dinner.

At some point parenting changed, and the idea that choices were important for children’s development became popular.  “Child centered parenting” was on the cutting edge, and giving children choices in what to wear, what to eat, and what to do was part of that.

At the very same time, our society was becoming increasingly industrialized with more and more consumer products becoming available in stores.  In the 50’s, as the world was recovering from WWII, middle class people in Western nations might have a car– or they might not.  But they usually didn’t have two cars.  Adult women might have a few nice dresses and a few for everyday wear, but that was it.  No one had a walk in closet–they didn’t need one! Children had clothes for dressy occasions, school, and play, and these categories did not mix.

Now that we have prepared foods at grocery stores, take-out food, fast food, Amazon, Target, and Walmart (plus lots of things imported from other countries where labor is cheap), dinner is often whatever your child wants. Kids often have a great deal of choice in clothing, and their weekends are full of playdates and activities of their choosing.

Is this helpful for children? Continue reading →

Talking about Technology

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Dr. Corinne Masur

The promotional website for Screenagers, a film about technology in families, is offering new conversation starters for parents every Tuesday. This week, they’re focusing on how kids feel about their parents’ connection to technology and asking the following questions:

  • What are some of the best ways I give you my attention?
  • Do you find that I’m on my phone, tablet or laptop when you want my attention?
  • What are ways you can tell that I am only half paying attention?

And if you’re interested in learning more about the movie: “Award-winning SCREENAGERS probes into the vulnerable corners of family life, including the director’s own, and depicts messy struggles, over social media, video games, academics and internet addiction. Through surprising insights from authors and brain scientists solutions emerge on how we can empower kids to best navigate the digital world.”

First Day of Daycare or Pre-school

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daycareDr. Corinne Masur

Sending your infant or young child off to daycare or pre-school for the first time can be heart wrenching – for BOTH to you.

Suddenly, the baby you cared for so carefully will be in the hands of others.  This can cause parents to feel more anxious than they anticipated feeling!  Often parents feel a loss of control over their child’s care and wellbeing.  Fear, guilt, and regret may follow.

What can you do?

The infant who is 6-months-old or younger: Continue reading →

The Importance of Failure

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Dr. Corinne Masur

Last week in The Sunday New York Times there was an article describing how college students need to to be TAUGHT that it’s okay to fail occasionally. Smith, a prestigious women’s college, offers a presentation called “Failing Well” during student orientation, which gives out a certificate saying, “You are hereby authorized to screw up, bomb or fail at one or more relationships, hookups, friendships, texts, exams or extracurriculars or any other choice associated with college…and still be a totally worthy, utterly excellent human.”

Evidently many 18 year olds are getting to college having suffered very few disappointments or failures of any kind. Or they get to college rarely having had to handle disappointment on their own. They are simply unprepared for this experience. Residence life offices are inundated with students who come in sobbing that they did not get their first choice of roommate, that they got less than an A- on an exam, or that they got rejected from a club.

How did we, as a society, or we as parents and educators and mental health professionals allow this to happen? We simply have to ask ourselves this question. Continue reading →

Dr. Sears and Attachment

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black_mom_kissing_babyDr. Corinne Masur

So many parents have read Dr. William Sears’ books and tried to approximate his description of attachment parenting. But how many knew that he and his wife developed these ideas not based on research, but based on their own reactions to their difficult childhoods?

It’s very challenging to adhere to his description of ideal attachment parenting (utilizing the co-sleeping technique, wearing the baby, and being as available to the infant and toddler as he suggests), especially for parents who work outside the home, have older children, or have to meet additional family demands.

Now, if the Sears’ work were based on solid longitudinal research, that would be one thing. It would behoove parents to make the sacrifices necessary to adopt some or many of his strategies. However, as it turns out, his theories are not research-based, but are rooted in his and his wife’s fantasies of what would have been better for them as children.

Clearly, a generation of parents have been strongly influenced by the Sears. And for those who were able to take the advice with several grains of salt and to apply their techniques when and where possible, babies may have benefitted from the closeness and attunement of these parents. But MANY parents have suffered the guilt of knowing they were not able to adopt these strategies due to limitations of time, money, energy, etc. And these parents have definitely been done a disservice by the Sears.

To learn more, check out this article in Time magazine and let us know what you think!

The Temptation to Lie…

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Dr. Corinne Masur

In a story about Mar a Lago, Donald Trump’s Florida home, the New York Times reported that there is a nursery, the walls of which are lined with tiles depicting story book figures. Years ago, when showing visitors baby Ivanka’s room, evidently Mr, Trump liked to tell them that the tiles were painted by a young Walt Disney. When he would tell the story, his long time butler would roll his eyes and after the visitors left, Mr. Trump would say to his butler, “You don’t like it when I do that, do you?” and the butler, Anthony Senecal, would say, “No, I don’t. Its not true” to which Mr, Trump would reply “Who cares?”

So…..the truth isn’t important? OR the impression one makes is more important than the truth? There is a temptation after reading this story to think, “Well, if Donald Trump can do that sort of thing and get to be President, why can’t I?” Continue reading →