Conflict

Thanksgiving Table Discussions

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Dr. Corinne Masur

People are afraid this Thanksgiving– not of the usual dried out turkey, but of the discussions that are anticipated at the table. Some are even skipping Thanksgiving altogether, in order to avoid painful conversations and heightened tension at their usual holiday gathering places.

This year poses even greater challenges for families than in previous years. The interpersonal differences and conflicts that we expect to at the holidays are trumped by the election hangover. Families that have members who voted for both Clinton and Trump are grappling with what do do.

For those who have decided to meet anyway, and even for those who agree on the election results, there’s something else to consider: what will the children at the table hear and what does it mean to them? Continue reading →

Answering Children’s Questions about Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton

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Dr. Corinne Masur

Today I heard about a little girl who came home from school asking if Hillary Clinton is a baby killer.

Another little girl came home asking what it means to “grope” somebody.

These are shocking questions coming from children.

And we as parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and members of the community also have questions: How do we answer the children’s questions? And how do we bear the pain of having to be asked? Continue reading →

Losing It: Those Lovely Family Moments

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The second in a series of Mindful Parenting posts by Bidi McSorley, MD, beloved Philadelphia pediatrician:

You know those moments – the ones where your child loses it, has a tantrum, and you react and lose “it” too. Afterwards, you seriously question why you wanted to be a parent. These are the times when it’s very difficult to stay present in the moment with your child. It is so hard to react not with anger, but with equanimity. These are the moments when it is difficult to catch yourself, take a breath, and stay calm.

A short explanation of neuroscience will help us understand what happens in these moments. Continue reading →

Competent Children: Part 3

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Dr. Corinne Masur

Recently, Judith Shulevitz wrote in the New York Times that college campuses are now barring speakers who might “invalidate people’s experiences” or who might speak about the use of sexist or racist language. She described how “safe spaces” are being created at schools during such lectures where students can come to play with play doh or bubbles or listen to soothing music. She says, “safe spaces are an expression of the conviction, increasingly prevalent among college students, that their schools should keep them from being bombarded by discomfiting…viewpoints.” Continue reading →

Aggression and Young Children: A Father’s Struggle

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by Dr. Corinne Masur

Recently I read on a parenting blog that if children show aggression it’s because they are in discomfort.

Is this really so?

And while we’re at it, what do we mean when we speak of aggression in the toddler or the young child? Are we talking about anger? Tantrums? Hitting and biting? All of these? Or more?

Defining our terms could be helpful before starting this discussion. Continue reading →