Tejal Toprani, LCSW

Mom friends? Who friends? What are those? Are mom friends just people you end up standing next to at the park while your kids play?

True to my assertive (aggressive?) personality, I’ve approached moms in public places who look seemingly normal and have kids about the same age as mine and asked for their number to schedule a play date. This however, has never happened to me.

I also tend to forget why I have someone’s number. Especially, when I look at my phone later and it says “red sweater woman at park son likes trucks.”

Much has been written about the topic of mom friends – but I have one question: Do the moms who need friends even have time to read about the importance of mom friends?

I practice the philosophy that friends – both mom friends and other friends – is a numbers game. This comes from all the moving I’ve done over the last decade. Continue reading →

A thoughtful look at navigating the storms of childhood:

Continue reading →

Check out our review of A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood!

Click on the link above, or find it under Reviews on the menu.

by Tejal Toprani

I’m sick. Like really sick. And no this isn’t one of those Shel Silverstein poems.

The reason my sickness is so poignant is that I am the captain of the ship. Not an actual ship – but the self-appointed ambassador of the house. A mom, a wife, a person with some semblance of a career – so I can’t go down. The positive of being an ambassador is that if there were an attempt on my life it would be called an assassination instead of a murder if you can call that a positive. But I digress – back to being sick. Continue reading →

Here is a fun Thanksgiving dish kids love to make!

You can have kids of any age help with this:

Steve’s Sweet Potato Marshmallow Balls

You will need:

sweet potatoes

1 bag marshmallows

brown sugar

butter

corn flakes

Roast how ever many sweet potatoes you need (2 for a small gathering of 4 people, more for a larger gathering) at 400 degrees until soft.  Let sweet potatoes cool then remove the skin and put into a large mixing bowl. Mash the potatoes using a potato masher or hands.  After mashing add a little brown sugar to taste.

Now for the fun part!

Put corn flakes on a cookie sheet with sides and have your child mash with his/her fists.

Then have your child stand at the counter and take a scoop of sweet potato and form into a ball around one marshmallow.  Each ball should be larger than a golf ball but smaller than a baseball.

Put the crushed cornflakes in a shallow soup bowl or on a cookie sheet with sides and roll each sweet potato ball in the corn flakes to coat.

Place finished sweet potato balls on a greased cookie sheet.  Put a pat of butter on top of each one.

Bake at 375 for 15 or 20 minutes or until the marshmallows inside are gooey.  Do not leave in too long or the marshmallows will totally melt and your child will be disappointed.  You can always take one out to test the marshmallow inside!

Serve warm.

Dr. Corinne Masur

Has your child come home recently saying he or she has been canceled? Or has your child told you that he or she has canceled someone else?

It’s a new term for an old behavior.  If someone does something you really don’t like, you can cancel them– that is, you can write them off, ignore them, have nothing to do with them, and just plain pretend they don’t exist.

Where did the term come from? Well, YouTube, among other places.

According to a teenager quoted in a New York Times article on the subject (11/3/19), canceling someone is a way to take away their power and call them out.  Another teen was quoted as saying that the word can also be used in fun, just to tease someone.

So, saying “you’re canceled” can mean any one of several things– from “I’m done with you” to “I’m pretending to be done with you but really we’re still friends.”

Sometimes people are canceled for offensive language or behavior, and it’s a response to racist, ableist, homophobic, transphobic, or misogynistic interactions.

Sometimes people are canceled just because…..well, someone decided they didn’t like something about them.

Is canceling someone the best way to deal with them when you’re upset with them?  What about talking to them and telling them you don’t like what they did and why? In situations where someone feels attacked or disempowered, is it that person’s responsibility to educate or challenge the person who caused the pain? What are the benefits and consequences of canceling them?

Parents, this deserves a conversation.  Think about these questions and how to talk with kids about conflict, power, and resolution. Be ready when your child comes home talking about having canceled someone– or when they threaten to cancel YOU!

This is the first in a series of humorous posts by Tejal Toprani Misra who is a psychotherapist in part-time private practice and a most-time stay at home mom. She lives in Philadelphia with her spouse and two young sons.

I recently made the grave error of taking a loud toddler and a 10-month-old crawler to a birthday party solo (my husband works a lot so this is a general theme in my life). Anyways, somehow, I convinced myself that going to this party was a good morning activity. Well it wasn’t. It was raining so that’s always a blast with my naturally curly hair – which  I’ve been fighting to keep straight since I was 14 – so I decided to drive to “avoid the rain” in a neighborhood that hasn’t heard of parking spots.

And then – the party itself: A common theme I’ve been noticing lately is a lack of food at children’s parties. Either the idea is that people above 48 inches do not need to eat or it’s poor planning. I’m not sure which. I was starving when I got there and when I finally found 60 seconds to eat, the food was gone. I was recently at another party where the birthday girl’s grandfather went for seconds and the box of pizza was empty. At this party the birthday girl’s mother had the audacity to brag that the party was so economical! Well of course it was when there were literally ravenous children there and no food for them OR the adults! In five more minutes that fourth birthday was going to turn into a riot. Continue reading →

“Generosity is not about sacrificing yourself for others — it’s about helping others without harming yourself.”

Check out this NYT article and let us know what you think:

https://parenting.nytimes.com/parent-life/adam-grant-advice-children?smid=fb-nytimes&smtyp=cur&fbclid=IwAR214tAbBdZ38S51z1wcZ0_18aH_4OUXuYk3y08vB_K-enuNZ7ldGpEJijE